The Magician.

Memory is the ultimate magician. She can transform a week-long adventure into a few faded snapshots, and make years of your life disappear. With the wave of her wand, or a whiff of that certain perfume, she can transport you back in time. She is so talented that our bodies do not distinguish Memory’s spell from the real thing. Our eyes tear and our hearts race just the same.

These days I am often under her spell. We’re in the car one moment, and I’m sitting at circle time the next. I can smell the wax crayons and hear the rhythmic reading of Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle. My eyes are focused on the book, but I catch glimpses of shiny chocolate hair and feel the tingly warmth of friendship. That warmth stays with me as I’m transported back to the car. I answer,

“Well, maybe some of the kids won’t like you, and that’s alright. The teachers will help you all treat each other with kindness. And you know what? You might just meet someone really special. You might meet a life-long friend in Kindergarten, just like I did.”

“Ok Mama,” J replies. “I really want to meet that special friend.” “I know Buddy. I bet they really want to meet you too.”

More often than not, Memory takes me to difficult places. Much of my childhood was fraught and watching my girls tread into those waters brings back a lot of angst. But not this week. J starts Kindergarten this week. J has the biggest heart of any kid I’ve ever known. She offers so much of herself that entrusting her to new people is scary (for both of us). But then Memory swoops in and my body is full of giddy childish hope. May J be lucky enough to find a true friend to love in Kindergarten.

My Kindergarten class photo - 1990.